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More Insurance Humor
Last Post 18 Mar 2007 06:12 AM by Medulus. 7 Replies.
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Gulfsun1
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15 Oct 2006 06:59 AM  
Seems the BBB got a complaint the other day about a scam where an AFLAC insurance representative was taking advantage of women on the street and stealing their money.
 
Now we all, at one time, thought that an INSURANCE Company has stolen from us, however this scam is netting COLD HARD CASH from unsuspecting individuals.
 
The way it works is....the thief uses children to distract the target.  While admiring the cuteness of the kids they are robbed of their cash and never know what hit them.
 
I'm sending this out for all to be aware that this is happening and it's right out on the streets where the general public is.
 
A passer by with a digital camera phone happened to capture the photo below. 
 
Review it carefully and use caution when distractions like this come along.
 
Good LuckDon't say you weren't warned (Watch out for Cute Ducks and Lizards)
 
 
Duck.bmp
Ronnie G.
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15 Oct 2006 07:32 PM  
After careful investigation of cell phone records it was determined they were all actress. Hired by a lizard for chicken feed and a few bucks.
HuskerCat
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16 Oct 2006 12:47 AM  
Thanks for clearing that up...I'd heard fowl play was suspected! 
PORTASATGUY
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18 Oct 2006 07:40 PM  
LOL, You aint right Craig!
R. Estes
Tom Toll
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20 Oct 2006 02:51 PM  

 A young boy went up to his father and asked him, "Dad, what is the
difference between potentially and realistically?" The father thought
for a moment, then answered, "Go ask your mother if she would sleep
with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Then ask your sister if she
would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars, and then, ask your
brother if he'd sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Come back and
tell me what you learn from that."


So the boy went to his mother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad
Pitt for a million dollars?" The mother replied, "Of course I would!
We could really use that money to fix up the house and send you kids
to a great University!" The boy then went to his sister and asked,
"Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" The girl replied, "Oh
my God! I LOVE Brad Pitt I would sleep with him in a heartbeat, are you nuts? The boy then went to his brother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" "Of course," the brother replied.
"Do you know how much a million bucks would buy?"

The boy pondered the answers for a few days and then went back to his dad. His father asked him, "Did you find out the difference between
potentially and realistically?" The boy replied, "Yes. Potentially, you and I
are sitting on three million dollars, but realistically, we're living with two hookers and a homo.

Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.
Tom Toll
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08 Nov 2006 02:07 PM  
Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental
hospital. One day while they were walking past the
hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into
the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and
stayed there.

Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the
bottom and pulled Jim out. When the Head Nurse
Director became aware of Edna's heroic act, she
immediately ordered her to be discharged from the
hospital, as she now considered her to be mentally
stable.

When she went to tell Edna the news, she said,
"Edna, I have good news and bad news. The good news
is you're being discharged. Since you were able to
rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and
saving the life of another patient, I have
concluded that your act displays sound mindedness.
The bad news is that Jim, the patient you saved,
hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe belt
right after you saved him. I am so sorry, but
he's dead."

Edna replied, "He didn't hang himself, I put him
there to dry."
"How soon can I go home?"
Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.
Tom Toll
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17 Mar 2007 06:49 PM  
On the first day, God created the dog and said: "Sit all day by the door
Of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I
will
Give you a life span of twenty years."

The dog said: "That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years
And I'll give you back the other ten?"

So God agreed.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said: "Entertain people, do
Tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life
span."

The monkey said: "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long
Time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?"

And God agreed.


On the third day, God created the cow and said: "You must go into the
Field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and
give
Milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life
Span of sixty years."

The cow said: "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty
Years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"

And God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created man and said: "Eat, sleep, play, marry and
Enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years."

But man said: "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty,
The forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the
Dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?"

"Okay," said God, "You asked for it."

So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy
ourselves.
For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family.
For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren.
And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.... Now go forth .

Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.
Medulus
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18 Mar 2007 06:12 AM  
Isn't "Insurance Humor" an oxymoron? Whatever we do we don't want to attract any actuaries to the website. Their jokes are the worst.
Steve Ebner

"With great power comes great responsibility." (Stanley Lieber, Amazing Fantasy # 15 August 1962)
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