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Newt
USA
657 Posts |
 Posted - 01/24/2003 : 07:12:53
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My thanks also GB, that was thoughtful and I am sure everyone appreciates the deed.
I never give up hope, my wife was given up two years ago, and the Doctor sent her home from the hospital and said Hospice was the way for her to receive the best home care. So I brought her home and the Hospice folks were wonderful. I cared for her every need, and she started on the road to recovery. Now, she is back in the kitchen baking all those wonderful pies. She is not on any kind of medication. Her problem was lung cancer, it could not be removed by surgery due to her weakened condition. She didn't want Chemo therapy, so the doctor gave her at the outside about six months. Three months ago, her checkup revealed that she was OK. Now the checkups are six months apart.
Faith can sometimes move mountains.
My son lost his sight over a period of 29 years, and he accepted blindness until the advent of stem cell transplants. His sister was a perfect match, so 20 months ago they did the transplant and within three months he got his sight back. Within six months he had his drivers licence with no restrictions and his vision was 20/20. He took up adjusting, and adjusted over two hundred claims. He was still on immune suppresion drugs.
He was the picture of health, 6'3", two hundred pounds, he didn't smoke or drink. He made a trip to Canada and when he got back he complained about his chest and back hurting. A trip to the doctor revealed that he had a cancer near his spine and one on his lung. The drugs he was on promoted the growth. Needless to say this was a blow to me because we had been so close.
He told me I needed to go back to work and try adjusting. I agreed with him, I was going nuts not doing anything but washing my truck and mowing grass.
I went to school and got a Texas and Alabama Licence, certified for Farmers and Xactimate, and came in and showed him. I left for Alabama and got the call the next day that he had passed.
Had he not suggested my going to work, I don't know how I would have coped. I can't get over the loss but I will get through it.
Cheryl, I know this is no comfort, but you must keep the faith that a miracle will happen.
What ever the outcome, know that you are not alone. You may suffer the pain of your loved ones, and thats the way it is meant to be. If we were unfeeling and didn't hurt we would be less of a person.
I am sorry for anyone going through this ordeal and I pray that you be strong in your faith and keep well. Tom is in my prayers constantly. Seems I have Looked to the Father for comfort a lot in the past few years, he is always there for us.
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Edited by - Newt on 01/24/2003 10:24:25 |
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Cheryl Joyce
USA
45 Posts |
Posted - 01/26/2003 : 00:01:45
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| Thank you for those words of encouragement. I want to make a reply and share all that I received from God, with you all. I know that it is only because of the many prayers from all of you here in this web site. It's like they say, "were two or more gather and they agree", god's will done. It is because of all of us, I got 4 big hours with him , with his eyes wide open, I was holding his hand and reading the messages you all had written by e-mail and I had printed your comments and messages from the bulletin-- for the first time in 11 days he made eye contact with a human (ME) I felt so priviledged, I read the messages and I would make comments on who they were from and ask him questions (obviously yes and no questions) and he would communicate by squeezing my hand,. Talk about the "POWER OF GOD", I just broke down and cried. He had not opened his eyes for any lenght of time, before then, it was just he and I in the room, nurses would float in and out because they could not believe that he had been having his eyes open and the fact that he was responsive to our conversation by squeezing my hand. He understood every word I said, every name I read. Tears came to his eyes, then tears came to my eyes again because I knew that by no shadow of doubt that he heard me, he saw me, he understood me!!!! That my ladies and gentlemen "IS THE POWER OF GOD", |
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Cheryl Joyce
USA
45 Posts |
Posted - 01/26/2003 : 00:43:16
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Sorry about that, I pushed the wrong box and button, I still had more to brag about, I think....
I am 400 miles away from him and when I got the news, I had to take a few days to wrap up some lose ends so I could leave town and go see him, not knowing what I would find. Ever since I had found out about this incident with Tom, I had been praying that if it is God's will that I get to see him to please let him hang on but not in pain. Sure enough, By the time I got there, he had been there 10 days, his family obviously did not tell me immediately when it occurred, as the seriousness was not known. Anyway, he lay there in body, but far, far away in mind. Body functions starting to disengate one by one, no communications (kinda hard with a tube down your throat) but in a far off land somewhere elese but not in that hospital room. I am the priviledged one, God answered my prayer (with help from all of you), Tom came around to share some important info and feedback even though it was by signal of hand squeezing. I got to witness to him again and tell him the plan of salvation (he is catholic) but you have to cover all bases in a time like this.......
Ok, bad news is, I asked him if he minded that I had made this post, earlier? And there were several other questions I asked to make sure that we were communicating and understanding each other. Tom communicated that he did not want all this attention and that I should not make any further posts about him. (He is a very private person). He is not mad that I had put it out there, but he had rather that I don't do it anymore. I told him it would be tough because he has so many people as friends that are concerned. I asked him again if he was sure that he understood what I had asked and he squeezed my hand for yes, again. I respect him for that. So my future posts will be small and non invasisve of his privacy, even though he considers all of you his friends.
After the four hours of our being able to visit and communicate, he went back into his mind, where ever he is and stays. He no longer communicates and when his eyes do open it is only for a moment, not more than 5 minutes and never any more communication by squeezing of the hand. So only once more I want to thank each and everyone of you for your prayer, as God gave us that time for closure. I did invite him to get well over the next 6 -8 months and that we would go up and down the coast somewhere and pick us up a hurricane or two and work togethter, just like we used to. Maybe that will give him something to think about when he zones out, which is where he stays now.
HEALTH REPORT: He is still on full life support, mostly unconscience, he received 2 pints of blood because his system is shutting down and not producing and they have to take so much for tesing this or the other. I learned a little about some of the machines he is hooked to and I was ablt to coach him into increasing his own breaths, above what the machine was doing for him. This coaching was done while unconscience, which indicates that he wants to respond but he can't show us by just looking at his face. He actually accomplishes these "power of suggestions" while he is unconscience. I know he is listing and there is still life in there, it's just not able to speak, move, open his eyes(for very long) and now he can no longer respond by squeezing. But I know he is in there...
Ok, I no longer will invade his privacy by making any more long posts. Occassionaly I will write "good day" or "bad day" with no explanation and this is only because I am a person of my word, and I gave it to him. He wishes to remain private and remembered as you knew him when he was active on the site.
Since Tom and I live 400 miles away, I will have to rely upon word from his sister. Hopefully this will soon be over, either he gets up - gets well and goes storming with me (I would even quite my regular full time job if it came down to it) or he leaves this earthly body filled with pain and goes to meet our saviour and is invived into the gates of heaven where he can walk and breath on his own.
Thanks and sorry for the long post. But I had to share this miracle event (the 4 hour thing) It was a Blessing and a Gift from God.
Thank you to all and God Bless you all. ......Cheryl |
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Cheryl Joyce
USA
45 Posts |
Posted - 01/26/2003 : 00:49:15
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Newt -- you have had some changing experiences over time too, thanks for sharing them. I home they fall back into place by now and that you are able to share joy and praises for the lord.
best regards,
Cheryl |
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Cheryl Joyce
USA
45 Posts |
Posted - 01/28/2003 : 19:34:16
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Because of all of you (and your prayers), Tom is making big strides. He is breathing on his own, he is getting stronger, with a ways to go. I look forward to him getting mad at me for sharing with you, but the alternative is worse, right?
Thanks for all your support.-------Cheryl |
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Ghostbuster
476 Posts |
Posted - 01/29/2003 : 09:12:01
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| How much longer untill we can deliver a care package composed of a Snicker bar, a box of Fiddle-Faddle, and a dirty magazine as a measure of our respect and concern? Or, would that be considered inappropriate? |
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Cheryl Joyce
USA
45 Posts |
Posted - 01/29/2003 : 22:44:32
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Your "care package" or visit might be just the thing he needs about now. He tries really hard to talk but just gets a little grunt now and then. He has come so far since I got to visit last week. I saw your card on the bulletin board, "from all the gang". That was so nice and thoughful. He's probably already read the magazine, haha. (what a relief to make a joke). I would say give him a kiss on the forehead, but that might be a little too personal- but he would know who put you up to it.(again another joke)! Reality being that I have not made a joke or had reason to laugh I am just taking the opportunity to share a light moment.
I think with all the prayers and talking to the angels, he might make it back strong enough to share some more of his wisdom here on the site again. I hope so.
I was reading some of the other categories here on the forum and got interested in the topic of "53 new claims what do I do first" (or close to the title) and I thought about what Tom might have to say about those chain of events, he might say something like, "let the wife do the packing, she doesn't forget anything, and take her with you cause she does do laundry and she works twice as hard". That I bet could be the helpful hints from "tom". I again try to remain on the lighter side as all of this has been so stressful.
I miss storming, you know it gets in your blood and you have to have it, it is like blood to a K-9. I have been doing dedicated staff (field adjusting) for a major company 8 years and it is like a perpetual constant storm with no increase in pay, no matter how many claims you get, you get the same amount of pay and there is always someone out of an adjacent territory you have to cover for or the wind, rain and snow is falling somewhere in your territory everyday. But that is what I get paid to do, so I can't complain. The only thing about staff vs trooping is at least you have an option of time off when you troop. I told my dad, right after I graduated from High School, when I lived in Europe, I said, you know dad, I'm going to move back to the states and get a job cause at least I would have a day off. You know with a regular job, you usually have set hours with designated days off, but that is not the case. So I guess I need to go back storming at least I would have a choice of getting paid for my hard work in lieu of getting used for my work. On the other hand variety and consistency breeds wisdom and experience, yes?
Well, duty calls, I have a truck wreck to go see about, see what I mean about that "day off (or night off)" stuff. No rest for the weary.
Thanks and I think Tom would be uplifted to hear from you and know that he is thought of by all you.(I have to break him out of his shell).
Best regards,
Cheryl |
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Cheryl Joyce
USA
45 Posts |
Posted - 01/30/2003 : 21:03:36
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With great sadness it takes every ounce of energy I can summon to tell you this news. It appears that Tom Joyce has handled his last file and made his final adjustment. Tom took a turn for the worse at 5:00 a.m. this morning and he has passed on to the mightly kingdom at 7:05 p.m. this evening. He will be truly missed.
Thank you kindly for all of your concerns, prayers, inspirations and well wishes for us all.
He had me fooled last night after I talked to him, at least I talked, he listened, by phone. I thought it was going so well. I guess he just completed his mission. As you all recognize, I had never placed a post on this web site, it had all been done by him. But like I said before, I knew your names and we discussed you each and everyday because insurance adjusting is what Tom and I talked about and made our living for 25 years.
Thank you for being here when we needed you. I may fade away, but I will always wander back. I must look for some peace of mind now that I have lost my best friend in the whole wide world.
God bless each and every one of you, my prayers will be with all of you. May God keep you safe and take you home quickly when it is time. There is no doubt that each one of you will take care of others just like you have comforted us.
Tom's parents and sister will prepare the church service funeral, I believe Tom body will be creamated, if I am still at a computer when I find this out, I will make a post to let you know when and where it would be.
He sure fooled me this time, I thought we were going to hit it back on the road together this season. This is what we have been looking forward to, all kids out of high school and in college, and us back on the road drifting from storm to storm, sending money home to the college kids.
Best regards,
Cheryl Joyce
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JimF
USA
1014 Posts |
Posted - 01/30/2003 : 21:39:59
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Cheryl,
For once I have no words to express my surprise at my friend Tom's death, more especially after reading your prior upbeat posting.
Words are such inadequate messengers of the sympathy and love and respect that I and so many had and have for Tom, his family, and most especially you. Tom never failed in the many of our phone chats to express his love for you, his gratitude for your support and understanding, and he always said that you were the better adjuster of the Joyce team. When I would kid him about that, his response was always that he had taught you everything he knew, but he was still learning from you.
Please know that you every bit as much as Tom are part and parcel of the CADO and cat adjuster family, and whenever any of us can help you and the family in any way, we are none of us more than a few clicks of the keyboard away.
Please keep us posted on funeral arrangements, and if you are comfortable with sharing, addresses where the catastrophe adjusters here can send their expressions of sympathy.
Just know that our prayers will continue in the days ahead for you and Tom's family, including his much larger extended family within the insurance community throughout this great United States.
We don't always understand God's plan but we live in the knowledge that what God doesn't accomplish in this world, he will accomplish in the world to come.
Tom was a friend to me and to all of us. He will be missed. And he will never be forgotten.
Love and peace.
Jim Flynt |
Edited by - JimF on 01/30/2003 21:54:36 |
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Cheryl Joyce
USA
45 Posts |
Posted - 01/30/2003 : 22:25:32
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Thank you for your kindness and compassionate feelings and for including me in the CADO Family, I need a family I am an orphan. I know I wrote in my "up beat" post about me having to get Tom out of his shell, well it was he that knocked my brick wall down, one brick at a time. I quickly put it back up once he got in, cause I didn't want to share our world with anyone else, except our dauthgters. So it was always he, I and the girls. Now I have to be pulled back into the main stream. Thank you for your kind words. We will talk again.
Best regards, |
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KileAnderson
USA
875 Posts |
Posted - 01/30/2003 : 22:38:08
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| God Bless you, Cheryl. Via con Dios, Tom. |
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katadj
USA
315 Posts |
Posted - 01/30/2003 : 22:43:50
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Thank you Tom Joyce, for being the friend that you are.
Thank you Tom Joyce, for all that you have shared.
Thank you Tom Joyce, For being you.
May the soul of this faithful departed, rest in peace, and never forgotten.
AMEN. |
Edited by - katadj on 01/30/2003 22:46:09 |
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Cheryl Joyce
USA
45 Posts |
Posted - 01/30/2003 : 22:44:04
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Whith in a couple of days I should know where the service will be held and I will let you know. Any cards you wish to send, you can mail them to 4102 Arbor Drive, Texarkana, TX 75501 -- my cell # is 903-277-4688, home phone is 903-832-8096. I pray that any of you who can attend, will. It would mean so much to him and his family. They are kinda like me, they think they are the only ones in his life, if we can get as many friends there, this will show the family that Tom was a much greater man than they let him be or thought of him. He was good..
good night. Love to all,
Cheryl |
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Tom Toll
USA
154 Posts |
Posted - 01/30/2003 : 22:57:16
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Cheryl, there are no words in the universe that can make someone feel better about losing a best friend and husband. That man cared for you and teased me all the time that you were the brains of the outfit and the conductor of the train.
One nice thing about friendship, your friends never leave your heart and soul, they are just physically misplaced. If you need any help, you know who to call.
I don't like losing friends, but death is an enevitable part of life. We don't like it, but it happens anyway. You are strong and now is the time to draw upon that strength. You and Tom have friends, don't be afraid to call them for support if you need it. We are here for you just like Tom and you were here for others. |
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Jim Lakes
USA
37 Posts |
Posted - 01/30/2003 : 23:37:59
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Dear Cheryl,
It is with deep sorrow and sympathy that I write this. As I stated in my prior post to you, I had hoped that God would see fit to let Tom recover and give us the chance to work with you and him. I do not and will not ever question God’s plan. I am sure that he is in a better place tonight.
I am sorry that we at RAC Adjustments never got the chance to work with you and Tom and I am sure that those that you and he have worked with will miss him.
May God Bless you and your family in this time of need and may He give you the comfort and power to understand that He is the only One that will some day bring you together again.
I am sure that I speak for many in saying that we wish you well and if we can help you in any way, we are just a phone call away.
May God Bless,
Jim Lakes
National Catastrophe Director
RAC Adjustments, Inc.
866.241.6574
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Prayers For TOM JOYCE
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